#3. The Dinner Special
As many of you know, Scott started a new job recently. He had a couple of days off when he left his previous job and we decided to go out to dinner one of those nights to celebrate. We did an earlier dinner so that we could take C with us.
So there she was sitting in her carseat while we read over the menu playing with her toys. Then she starts squirming and getting irritated. As is our routine, I made a bottle as Scott started unbuckling her to feed her.
Then it was like slow motion. As soon as he picked her up I saw the mark she left on the carseat. Before I could say anything, Scott already had her in his arms and gave me an OMG-what-is-this look. Then calmly, as though he were explaining to me how to disarm a bomb, he said, "I need the mat, wipes, a diaper and a clean onesie." Without switching arms or shifting her at all, he got up, grabbed supplies, and went straight to the bathroom.
Interestingly, the awkward moment really only came when I had to knock on the mens' room door to give Scott a plastic bag to put her clothes in.
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| Lalala, celebration dinner.....SOMETHING JUST HAPPENED. |
#2. The Doctor is In
A few weeks after baby C arrived, I had to go back to the OB for the usual postpartum check-up. I get through all the fun usual tests and while I'm waiting to go into the exam room, C starts getting fussy in her carseat.
As a new mom, this made me....uncomfortable. I'm the quiet one that likes to blend in with the wallpaper. So I start unbuckling her and bouncing her in my arms and notice a wet sensation. Completely oblivious to any signs or clues to a blowout diaper, I chalk it up to hormones making my skin feel creepy-crawly.....until I move my hand up and her whole back is wet.
I looked down into the carseat, and sure enough she's painted it brown. I quickly grab everything and pray the handicap bathroom is open so I can spread my newly furbished baby tools to operate.
Ten-million wipes, two baggies and a new outfit later, we're ready to go into the doctor. No joke. TEN. MILLION. WIPES. First time blowout. Unforgettable.
#1. The Rainbow
If there's anything we've learned about C, it's that she's unpredictable. This does not bode well with a new mom who likes to follow the textbook on parenting. The day we left the hospital with her, it had been 2 days since she pooped. No one at the hospital seemed concerned, but it was made very clear in my handbook that for every day after a baby is born, they should be having the same number of poops.
But nope. Not C.
The day after we get home from the hospital, we're at the lactation department asking questions and they are in absolute disbelief that she hasn't pooped in 3 days.
So they send us to the pediatrician, who is completely unconcerned. Apparently breastfed babies can go a whole 7 days without pooping and even then, they're not too worried.
So we waited.
And waited.
And then it happened.
Mom was still staying with us to help out with taking care of C and was changing her for bed one night when I heard a scream from the nursery.
I ran in to find mom holding C's legs and a volcano of poop pouring out. It just kept coming. Of course, in the parenting books, there's a certain color for every day after you get out of the hospital.
We went through all of them in one continuous stream.
And all we could do was just hold her legs and let it happen.....and quote the movie Bridesmaids.
"No Megan, no!" and "Look away!" and, my favorite...
It was pretty fantastic, to say the least. Great bonding moment for the 3 of us.
Honorable Mention:
Green Bean Casserole
C was having some stomach issues, and so on our 2 hour drive to visit my mom's house this wasn't a total surprise (which really takes away from the fun).
My husband, excited that we were taking the "new" van on a trip turned to me and asked, "Did you just fart green beans?"
#1. Is this physically possible?
#2. (ha! #2....) Would that really count as a fart?
A slow head turn to the back seat answered one question:
#1. Yes, it's physically possible.
#2. (#2...hehe) We're still debating.
Luckily the next exit had a conveniently located Hobby Lobby with an outside trash can. I'm pretty sure there were some seasoned mothers walking by the scene laughing at us. I was on the floor of the van changing the diaper while Scott was cleansing (as best as he could) the carseat, both of us gagging.
We dropped the package of wipes and the diaper in the trash and made off like bandits into the sunset.
I sincerely apologize to whoever had to change that trash liner. We did tie everything up nicely in a plastic bag and sealed it as best we could.
So there ya go. Everything you didn't want to know about our 7 month old daughter. I'm sure this list will be updated in the future. Good times!
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